new year, new goals.

as 2012 came to an end, i began to ponder what my resolutions for 2013 would be.  i'd never really chosen resolutions until about two years ago, but both years i learned some valuable lessons and had specific interactions that have stuck with me to this day.  as i continue to work on those two things, i decided to add a couple more for the upcoming year.  when i was choosing, i wanted to not only impact my own personal growth, but also have the ability to impact others lives, as well.  finally i decided on one main goal and then a few secondary goals.

1. write every single day.  i have always loved to write and have so many journals that are maybe a fourth of the way filled.  eventually i get busy or bored or distracted or overly critical of myself and it isn't as much of a priority as it was a few weeks or months before.  an unfinished journal irks me to no end, so i end up trashing it.  i'm going to fill a book, or maybe three, this year.  it doesn't matter how much or how little i write in one sitting or one day, as long as i've written something.  some days it will be serious and i'm sure some days i'll write something funny just to get it over with.  but to me, words equal growth.  this is how i think, how i resolve things, how i best communicate.  surely looking back on a year of words will give me written evidence of the ways i've grown and changed and worked through things and become a better person.
2. give back.  when i really sit and think about my life, i realize that in spite of tough days or weeks or months, i really have so much to be thankful for.  in addition to the normal sunday helping out at church routine and looking for ways to love on friends and family during the week, i'm going to look for new opportunities to serve others and make an impact on the city i live in.  this includes things like go cincinnati, volunteering to do hair somewhere on a saturday or helping at the citylink center.  we're called to go and be the church, so this year (and hopefully every year after), it's going to be a priority.
3. learn healthy relationships.  i'm an all or nothing person, i come on strong and i'm a lot to handle.  if you're one of the few to intrigue me and stimulate my mind, as well as make me laugh, i want to spend quite a bit of time with you.  if you've proved to me that you're going to be there through thick and thin, i want to confide in you.  but on the flip side, if you have let me down and haven't established much of a track record with me yet, i'm quick to say goodbye.  i'm also not quick to establish super close relationships with those who don't hook me from the very first moment we meet or i feel like i have to constantly work hard to make the friendship happen.  i need to learn the give and take, a healthy middle ground and what the word steady means.  it's okay to distance yourself without burning a bridge.  people come and go and some friends are only meant for a certain season of life.  my goal is to be happy with the friendships i have, to realize that people come and go, friendship shouldn't be stressful or exhausting, new people come into your life for a reason and to embrace it and to never feel guilty.
4. create more.  the same way the written word inspires me, so do other forms of art, especially photography and painting.  i plan to become a better photographer this year and actually finish more paintings (which are really just collages because i typically don't freehand well).  this is much more productive and therapeutic than just sitting in front of the television.  and you also end up with a souvenir from the big things you experienced throughout the year.

so that's that.  those are the goals.  they seem easy enough, but i'm sure that once i'm in the middle of them and start being stretched or become uncomfortable, i'll have to remind myself what the purpose is. i'm hoping that at the end of 2013, i'll not only have physical evidence of growth, but also an array of stories and memories from things i experienced and lessons i learned.  here's to 2013, a year of learning about myself and those around me.